Our (Neurodiverse) Family

This post took its time in coming because I had to really think about what my dream job would be. I used to take this question a little too seriously--I always thought the dream job was supposed to be a real one. I didn't think it could be a made up job. And yet, I couldn't even come up with a made up dream job. I guess in my mind, once you do something to get paid, you start hating it. Back when I was getting ready to go to college, people at church kept asking me if I was going to study music, since I played the violin and my mother studied music. I used to tell them, "No, because by law of nature, you are supposed to hate your job, and I don't want to hate music!" Plus, I know I wouldn't have survived BYU's music program on the off chance I would have gotten in. Practicing four hours a day? Yeah, I don't have the attention span for that. So, what is my dream job? Blogger. Well, technically, I am a blogger, in my own small sphere. But there...

Isn't this kind of redundant considering that the last post was about things that would make me happy? Oh well, here goes: (1) An always clean house. Unfortunately, this isn't realistic when you live with a toddler. How about a maid? (2) More money. Granted, our financial situation is MUCH better now than it was while Stephan was in school. Seriously, I don't know how we survived. Wait, yes I do, it was by the grace of God. And very generous parents. However, our grocery bill has gone up since Kate has been eating more table food and less breast milk.... (3) More energy . I'm a mom and I have depression....'nuff said.

(1)  If Kate would start walking already. Mostly, I'm just sick of everyone asking, "Is she walking yet?!" No, she is not walking. We have decided that just like every other milestone, she's doing it on her own terms. And yet, I'm a paranoid first-time mom who worries about her developing normally, even though she has hit every milestone within the normal time frame. Yes, I realize that 12 months is the *average* age for babies to start walking, and that as long as she's walking by 18 months, I don't need to worry so much. But dang it, it seems like all the other babies her age in our ward are walking already. I remind myself that the babies in my family like to take their time in walking. (2) More hours in the day. Often after I get Kate to bed, I look at the clock and see that I should be getting to bed soon if I want to get a reasonable amount of sleep. But then I stay up too late and regret it the next day. How about some extra hours, so I can get ...

(1) Your future husband lives in another state. You have not met him. Pay no attention to those other seemingly attractive males. (2) It's not a sin to dress fashionably. (3) You are not ugly. (4) Work hard, but not too hard. (5) Be forgiving. (6) You have depression--seek help. (7) Your happiness DOES matter (8) I know it seems like you're the only 16-year-old who doesn't have a driver's license, but you are definitely not. Your future husband won't get his until he's 21. It won't matter in ten years :) (9) Chair placement is no indication of talent. And it is not important in the long run. (10) Most of all, you DO matter. Heavenly Father loves you a lot more than you think.

"I can't date him! He looks like my younger brother!" Those were my exact words to my roommates when I came home from my first date with Stephan. It was a blind date, set up by my roommate Jenny and her friend Andrew. Jenny had met Stephan a few months before at Andrew's single's ward activity in Pleasant Grove. After exchanging only a few words with Stephan, she deemed him perfect for me. When she and Andrew offered to set me up with him, I turned them down. I was *kind of* dating someone else at the time, although I was rather confused about where things were going. It wasn't long after that when I found out that he wasn't interested in having a relationship with me, and with that, we stopped dating. A week after that, I told Jenny that I changed my mind and that she could set me up with Stephan. The date happened about a month after that, and I was glad it was a double date or else it would have been a rather one-sided date, with me trying unsucce...

What exactly is a "legitimate" fear? I guess it is supposed to mean rational versus irrational fears. But aren't all fears inherently irrational? Okay okay, I'll stop overanalyzing now. First I'll start with the seemingly silly... (1) Dogs My apologies to any dog-loving/owning friends who may be reading this, but I'm afraid of dogs. I had a few too many scary experiences with dogs during my most formative years, starting when we lived in Japan. On our trips to the grocery store (we had to walk), there was a house on our route with a German shepherd chained in the front yard. Every time we walked by, the dog would probably have attacked us if not for the chain. According to my mother, this freaked me out. Then we moved to the west Houston suburb of Katy, Texas, where my fears were further solidified. Next door to us lived a dysfunctional family with boys who were into every possible dangerous thing you could think of. They had a Lassie-like dog ...

During my daily perusal of Pinterest, I came across this blog post  called "30 things my kids should know about me", and I felt inspired. I use this blog as a journal of sorts, and lately it has been more about Kate than about me. I have also been having a writer's block of sorts, so the list in the original post will give me topics to write about. For day one, I will be telling you 20 random things about myself. Here goes nothing... (1) I have long toes (2) No matter how many times I've tried to like them, I can't stand fresh tomatoes. (3) At 5'4", I am the shortest in both my family and Stephan's family. (4) Steven Sharp Nelson performed at my wedding reception before he became famous. I have the photos to prove it. (5) I have a relative who fought and died in the Alamo. (6) I was on the front page of the Daily Herald for trying to learn how to knit. Apparently that was bigger news than the Brian David Mitchell trial. (7) It seems I ...